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The Big Question

At the heart of it, my change of direction is not only for my immediate health but to answer the big question in my life:

Why don’t I want to lose weight?

This may seem like an odd question coming from someone who has been trying (and losing, and gaining back) weight for so long, but it’s the question that has been bothering me for a long time now. I can lose weight. I know how to and I know what to do. But what keeps me from doing it?

Why do I, instead of ‘falling off the wagon’ and getting back on, fall off the wagon and roll around into the mud while trying to dig myself such a deep hole that it’ll suck the entire wagon inside, never to be ‘gotten back on’ again?

As much as I try and succeed, there is a part of me that wants to pad itself with weight and never see the light of day again.

I have gotten past all the anger and shame to do with the question, leaving it more of a matter of curiosity than anything.

I’m sure it has to do with control; I don’t want anything being taken away from me. I am also on a journey to learning to self-soothe without food, which is a biggie because food was the only thing I could depend on for most of my early life.

With those kind of things standing in my psychology, I’m attempting to be patient with myself.

Did I mention patience isn’t my virtue?

The Naturally Curvy Feed

It’s come to my attention that my feed isn’t working nicely… It works for me by inputting the site to Google Feed Reader, but not everyone uses that.

I’ve set up something at FeedBurner here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/NaturallyCurvy

Please feel free to suggest anything else I can do.

Category: Announcements  Comments off

At the Beginning…

…there was cheesecake.

Kidding!

Whenever I have started something new in the past, I have always gone ‘whole hog’. Be it a new diet, a new exercise regime or even a new job. Little stops just weren’t for me. Five minutes of walking? Start with five minutes? Pfft. Why start there when I can start with an hour (and end up hurting ankles, knees, hips, whatever). Cut bread out of the dinner meal? Nah. I’ll cut it out of every meal.

Even in my writing, I’ve never been one to sit down and write give minutes here and there. If I can’t settle in for a good amount of writing time, I don’t want to do it.

Life isn’t like that, though. Even when we do plan out large chunks of time to do certain things, other things come up. Other things get in the way. Plans change.

So instead of jumping into things with lists and schedules, tables and time slots, I am taking things calmly and slowly.

At the moment, I am focusing on the Buddhist staple that everything changes. The idea is that if you learn to accept that everything changes – even within a moment – then you will learn to let go. It is through holding onto things – like people, negative emotions, bad situations – that we bring fear and pain into our lives. If we can step back and let go enough to observe the changes, we will start to find peace.

Right now I am at the very beginning in that I am trying to be mindful of everything that changes. It has helped me to tune into my body and what stresses me. For instance, I went into my emails this morning to start work and my breathing became faster like I was starting to panic.

How many mornings has this happened without me noticing and thus working through the morning in a panic state?

So what’s the saying… ‘Keep calm and carry on’?

Change of Focus

With all the illness I have dealt with in the past six weeks, I have had a lot of time to sit and think about things. I’ve talked with doctors, talked with my husband and thought long and hard about the things that are important to me.

I have had a lot of revelations recently, which have lead me to see that my life is mostly directed by fear, a byproduct of the abuses I suffered as a child. I have learned to see my subconcious not as something working against me but as something that has worked hard for me over the years as my protector. Something that is not going to be convinced that I am safe with the say I am living my life now.

I have remembered that I am sensitive to stress and have a fairly low limit before it starts influencing my health. I have also come to see that the number on the scale is something I need in my life because I could ‘lose control’ without it.

I look at this blog and the archives, and I think about all the ups and downs over the years. If there is one thing I have taken from that, it’s that I never stop trying. I make mistakes by the dozen and have believed in false solutions, but I never stay on the ground for long.

But now it’s time to stop fighting.

Don’t get me wrong; this isn’t giving up. I have come to see, though, that my life has been about fear, fighting and survival for far too long. There isn’t nearly enough rest, relaxation and acceptance. I can talk to you all afternoon long about simple things to do to help lose weight. I know very little about how to let go of the things that helped me gain weight in the first place.

For years now, this blog has been about fighting the good fight to get healthy. There’s nothing wrong with that, and I still love to read blogs about those who are doing that. But for me? My time for fighting has come to a stop for now. Today I am taking deep breaths and changing the path I’m walking on.

I will still talk about the usual, most likely. Plus, I will still get on the scale – though I can’t tell you how often at the moment. But I will also be incorporating my new goals for my life, adding to them as I see fit and taking away when necessary. I will be working on creating a safe environment for myself in all ways and learning more about living and letting go rather than holding on and forever keeping in motion.

I hope the few loyal readers I have will stay with me because I do care about you and care what you think. I also hope you’ll enjoy the slight change in direction from here on out…

Category: General  5 Comments

0 for 3

Another relapse. More new fun. This time it comes with ear infection piled on top.

I swear, I’ve spent more time in bed in the past for weeks then I’ve spent awake.

Ah well. Once I’m on my feet again, it’s back to square one.

Category: Checking In  2 Comments