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2011 Wrap-Up

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
*Moved more than a kilometre in Australia (haha)
*Had the pets outnumber the humans
*Published a novel

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
*Probably not. I don’t really remember what they were in the first place.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
*I don’t know about ‘close’, but people I know gave birth. Plenty of bubs for the year. No one I know in person, though…

4. Did anyone close to you die?
*Not as far as I know.

5. What countries did you visit?
*Just Australia, this year.

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
*Better self-control. There are plenty of things I would like to do, but they require sticking to a schedule – something I’m not the best at.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
*February 4th, when we moved into the place we’re renting now. It was absolutely stinking hot and humid. By the time we were in, we just put the mattress on the floor in the kitchen because that’s where the aircon is and fell asleep.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
*Publishing my novel – Echo Falls.

9. What was your biggest failure?
*Letting my weight gain so much. A large part of the initial gain was moving into a place without a working oven/stove, but I had plenty of time to correct that.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
*YES. Ugh. The flu that didn’t leave me be for nearly two months and ended off with a particularly strong ear infection. Not fun.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
*Copies of my book. Haha. Other than that… I don’t think I actually bought anything noteworthy.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
*My husband’s. As always, he’s stood strong by me while I’ve dealt with things.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
*Turn on the news. Pick some names.

14. Where did most of your money go? 
*Honestly? Food and drink. Isn’t that where it usually goes?

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
*Publishing my novel. (I promise I’ll only mention it sixteen more times.) Getting our first dog… and getting our second dog when it became obvious Brin needed a companion.

16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
*I honestly don’t know. I don’t listen to a heap of music.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Calmer, which is the more important for me
b) thinner or fatter? Fatter.
c) richer or poorer? About the same, I think. A little less in debt from paying a year’s worth of student loan payments, so I guess that would make me richer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
*Exercise (haha – but seriously…)

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
*Mucking about wasting time. Doing little things that end up taking so much time like playing Facebook games or pressing the snooze button on my alarm.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
*Having fun. Driving around a bit, making homemade pizza, movie marathon – all with the husband.

21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
*No, but I stayed in love, which is just as important these days.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
*I can’t really say. I didn’t stick to any particular one for very long when I did watch television.

24. What was the best book you read?
*The Hunger Games series.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
*A minor. Just kidding. No great discoveries.

26. What did you want and get?
*A lot of stationary/scrapbooking supplies.

27. What did you want and not get?
*A lottery win.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
*I don’t keep up with movies, so I couldn’t really say…

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
*I turned 25 this year and had a night at a pizza place with a mate who has a birthday close to mine – with all our friends, of course.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
*Not having to deal with the flu.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
*Confused.

32. What kept you sane?
*Deep breathing.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
*None.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
*Occupy Wall Street

35. Who did you miss?
*No one specifically.

36. Who was the best new person you met? 
*Missy! She was like insta-friend and it’s been great ever since.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
*That it’s okay to admit you need help.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
*If you’re wrong in all the right ways. – Raise Your Glass – Pink

Category: General  2 Comments

Happy Holidays

Category: Announcements  Comments off

Here’s to You

Here’s to all the people who truly need Christmas cheer. To everyone who wants to feel happy but can’t. To everyone who smiles through the pain until they can be alone to cry. To the people who see the joy on others’ faces but can’t quite feel it in themselves. To the people with the invisible ailments that don’t show on the outside, but hurt so much on the inside.

During this holiday season, here is to all of you. Because the most precious gift often is knowing that you aren’t alone.

Category: Mental Health  Comments off

There Comes a Time…

…when, if you don’t stop, your body will stop for you.

I can’t believe I let it happen to me again, but I did – and yesterday I suffered the consequences.

With the hormones, the demands from work (and a lot of demanding people), suddenly having to figure out how to do Australian income taxes, a stack of Christmas cards yet to finish and send out, financial woes, and just wanting nothing more than to sit down and write… Well, all that stress bubbled up and came out yesterday.

After walking out of the tax office (an appointment we had to put on our credit card), I sat down on the steps and just cried. Poor Bloke was great and helped me to calm down, but I was in full on panic attack mode just trying to breath and not think about anything other than being in that exact moment. Every time I started thinking about something else we had to do, I couldn’t breathe again. So I had to sit and not think about any of it.

Not exactly an easy task for a woman who runs her to-do list through her head almost constantly.

I managed to calm down and make it through the day, but getting the rest of my work done involved frequent breaks because I couldn’t sit for long doing it before I’d start to tear up and have trouble breathing again.

Today is a bit better, but I still have to layer my work with task, non-work something, task, non-work something… (This is one of my non-work somethings.)

I was in denial. I was in denial about being exhausted, about being strapped for cash, about having to declare a no-presents Christmas because we just can’t afford it, about the fact that not having a ‘proper’ Christmas broke my heart because it’s ‘my’ holiday, that I was freaking out over having to learn taxes because we can’t afford an accountant, about… a million and one different things.

I’m so tired of feeling like I have to justify my stress because someone might scorn me for having it better than they do.

So no more justifications, no more denying that I want to give my husband a gift on Christmas even if I have to put it on a credit card and no more feeling like I have to keep my mouth shut when they treat me like crap.

I’m done with all of it.

Hormones

This week I have hormones on the brain and, apparently, coursing through my body.

I have PCOS, which basically means everything is harder. Feeling good, feeling happy, getting (and staying) fit, losing weight and makin’ babies. I went into the doctor yesterday not only to get to know a new female doctor I’ll be seeing but also to discuss some problems I’ve been having lately.

From headaches to cramps to annoyingly super sensitive nipples, I have been scoring better than a hormonal trifecta over the past two weeks. While these signs might be happy little warning flags to many women, for me, it’s just another reminder that my hormones are out of wack and I’m not doing enough to set them straight.

Thankfully the hormone gods have granted me some reprieve. While I’m usually a sweet-tooth kind of woman 100%, I have been totally digging the salt lately. While I have to be careful about getting too much of that as well, I’m just glad not to be desperate for chocolate or other sweet things.

So if I’m a little grumpy this week, blame my hormones. I do. :P

Unfortunately, the onset of so many things at the same time has my doctor directing me to go back on the pill. There are a lot of reasons why I don’t want to go back on the pill, but whether I do or not depends on how much longer I can tolerate what’s happening to me…

Category: Body, General  2 Comments